Dealing with disappointment

Recently, I made a disappointing experience. I imagined a specific event taking place in my life hoping that it was God’s will for me. But it didn’t happen. 

Unfortunately, dealing with disappointment is part of life. I guess you know what I’m talking about. Your expectations concerning a relationship, friendship, or job weren’t met far too often. It hurts and it takes a lot of courage to hope again. 

While reflecting upon what was happening the conclusion seemed obvious: God withheld something good from me and didn’t want me to experience blessing. (Which was a lie, of course) 

In God’s presence, I laid down my thoughts and feelings. I asked him to turn this situation around and use it for something good. I wanted God to somehow use my disappointment for his glory.

Time went by and I noticed God changing my attitude concerning that disappointment. Here are a few insights I got during that process:

1.No one can take away what God has for me. If it was God’s will for me, he would have brought it into my life. Since it didn’t happen, it wasn’t according to God’s will for me or it just wasn’t his timing. In the end, it’s about what God wants to do in my life. Anyhow, I can take faith in the fact that his intentions for me are good. I wrote an entire blog post about God’s intentions for us. Read it HERE.

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11

2.Renewal of the heart. During that inner process, I realized that I wanted this thing too much. I had to learn once again, to surrender my desires to God. I prayed that he would use this situation to cleanse my heart and refocus it on him and his will for my life. 

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:2

3.Focus on eternity. We know that our time here on earth is limited. However, we get caught up in the minutiae of everyday life. I had to adjust my perspective to God’s bigger picture and see the short span of my life through his eyes. 

I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. Romans 8:18

4.Being grateful for what I already have. When we set our minds on what we long for, we neglect to count our blessings. I recalled all the good things God has already done in my life. Pondering upon my blessings created in me a thankful heart.

I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds. Psalm 9:1

5.Sharing testimonies is encouraging. But talking about disappointments can comfort others. If others know about our difficulties and disappointments, they don’t find themselves alone in their struggles. In a world of social media’s highlight reels, this situation is an opportunity to open up about our imperfect lives, so others get comforted. 

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. 1. Thessalonians 5:11

Those insights brought me to the conclusion that with Jesus I can only win. I would have rejoiced if God brought that specific thing into my life, which would have been a real blessing. But since it didn’t happen, I still won a lot. My heart’s focus got adjusted and my eyes were directed towards what’s most important. I look towards eternity in anticipation of what lies ahead while cultivating a grateful heart looking at what I’ve already got. Dealing with that disappointment brought me closer to the heart of Jesus. 

Read more blog posts:

How to share the gospel despite rejection

God is not always speaking

My God why have you forsaken me

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