It was a relationship unlike anything I’ve seen before. The two of them seemed to be so closely connected in love but not clingy in any way. Their hearts were interweaved but not because they needed each other to be happy, but because God led them together. I believe they’d truly trust each other with their lives. That’s how I’d describe their marriage.
A few months after giving my life to Christ, a friend from childhood and his wife took me to church for the first time. As soon as I met them, I knew that something was different about them. She was the loveliest woman I’ve seen in a long time as she seemed to shine from the inside out. And she was truly interested in me as I person. This was huge for me because I was very hard to get to know due to social anxiety back then.
After my first church service, I was inspired. What intrigued me the most was that couple. I knew that I wanted whatever they had. I wanted a marriage like theirs and I wanted to shine from the inside out in a way the world doesn’t know.
Over the next few weeks and months I told God that this is exactly what I wanted. And I made the decision that I won’t date or courtship any other guy until I’ll meet the one I’m going to marry. And God heard my prayer. Looking back, I see how he led me on a path of heart healing, restoration and building my identity in Christ alone. I’ve spent time with God daily and let him change me from the inside out. He started planting desires in my heart so that I knew what to look for in my future husband.
11 years passed since I first visited a church service with that happy couple. Back then having what they had seemed so far out of reach. Little did I know that in the following years, God would prepare me for my future husband. And even less was I aware of how much our future marriage would far exceed my expectations. Never ever did I thought I could truly have something so fulfilling and amazing that they had, because I was a mess when I came to Christ.
My husband and I have soon been married for 4 years and I can only say this: God is good and faithful! For both of us, God takes the first place in our hearts and not our spouse. And we know that we get the one and true love only from our heavenly Father. Our marriage is his gift to us and his tool for others to get to know about Christ.
I didn’t have a lot of open wounds when we got married, because I went through years of God restoring my heart before I met my husband. There was no need for fighting because we both knew who we were in Christ and our vision was bigger than just building a family. Our first priority has always been to build God’s kingdom and not ‘being a nice and happy family with a house and a garden.’ God has been working on my husband’s heart as well, and we’re both still changing and growing daily.
I won’t lie to you: The 7 years that followed, after visiting my first church service, weren’t easy. I spend countless hours on my knees. I had to forgive, received forgiveness, cried, voiced my anger and so much more. But God met me there, he showed me who he was and who I am in Christ. Most of the preparation for my marriage happened in my prayer closet. In the early morning hours that nobody saw, I was faithfully reading the Bible and praying my heart out to God. Every second I spend in those quality hours with God was worth more than anything in the world.
Don’t get me wrong: Our marriage isn’t perfect. We’re still working and talking through different issues, because I believe every healthy marriage needs constant adjustment and growth. But much of our heart’s healing happened before we got married.
When people say that marriage is hard work, I disagree. I believe it’s heart work. What happens in your prayer closet determines how you live and love in your family. Having a fulfilling and peaceful marriage with open and honest communication habits is possible for every believer. But it all starts in the presence of the Lord on our knees. God will reward you for the countless hours you spend on your knees allowing him to heal your heart.
Read more:
10 things to pray while pursuing the one
10 things to pray over your husband
How God told me what job to apply to
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